Complaining...

Ok... So anyone mind if I just complain for a little bit? Actually... who cares?! It's my blog! I'll complain all I want! So... I'm having body image issues. After I had Lily (about 6 years ago) I had NO PROBLEM losing weight. I gained about 60 lbs and it just slowly came off naturally throughout her first year. After she turned 1 and I was still 20lbs away from my pre baby weight I was like, "Hmmm... I should go on a diet." So I did. I did weight watchers. I wasn't really strict about it either! AND I didn't work out at all! After about 12 weeks I lost the 20 lbs and looked even better that I did in high school! Ugh... So NOW Bridger just turned 1 March 13th. And I am again 40lbs away from what I would like to be. I started his pregnancy a little overweight and so even though I only gained like 35... I still have more to go. AND IT IS HARD!!! I decided in January to join the gym and start my weight watchers again. So... for the past 3 months I have been working out and doing my weight watchers. So my good ol' lose 40 lbs... take a wild guess how much I have lost... go ahead... guess! WRONG!!!! Whatever you guessed is wrong. BECAUSE I have lost a total whopping FIVE POUNDS! FIVE POUNDS! What??? Yeah yeah... so I lost an inch everywhere! So?? I want to look good again!! Holy crap guys... If I ate like my husband... I would be 350 lbs! Am I going to stay this way forever? Keep in mind... the 5 lbs I did lose was in the first 4 weeks. I haven't lost a dang thing for 8 weeks! 8 weeks! Well, except for when I had the stomach flu, then food poisoning right after (but that doesn't count because as soon as my body started DRINKING WATER again.. it came right back!) What do I do? Dan keeps saying, "Stop stressing about it so much. It will probably come off when you stop stressing!" But really guys... I'm 5' 7" and weigh 188 lbs! I can't get below it! I wear a size 14! I realize that isn't huge or anything... but I don't feel confident at all. Before having Bridger (keep in mind it was a whole year ago) I weighed around 160 and wore a size 10! I don't want it to warm up because then I have to shed off the hoodie that I have been hiding behind. I know my husband loves me and for some reason still finds me attractive. I just don't know why! I still look pregnant. I have rolls down my belly when I sit down... Uh!!! It would be one thing if I just looked like this and wasn't working on it... but I am! EVERY DAY! I realize I don't make it to the gym 7 days a week... but I'm putting forth effort! I eat healthy and low fat constantly! What the heck? I am sooo frustrated. Maybe I should work out 2 hours a day. And instead of adding in activity points to my day, I should just not. Maybe that would work? Trainers at the gym, advise not to take away the points because my body needs them... but it's not WORKING!! What do I do??? Any words of encouragement? Help? Anything? I'm so down in the dumps.

What I looked like after losing my weight with Lily. I would just give anything to look like that again!

What I looked like before getting pregnant with Bridger.

What I looked like 3 weeks after having Bridger.

What I looked like 3 months ago.

What I look like now!!! All that hard work... for nothing. Uhhh... How do I get back to my cute little body? My point is.. it's not like I just have a "mom" body now because I looked better than ever after having Lily! Women just have it tough all around. All men have to do is THINK baouit losing weight and it falls right off. It's NOT fair.

Ok... the end.